Creep of the Week: FDA

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FDA logo letters in white with a blue background
Food And Drug Administration logo from the U.S. Food And Drug Administration website.

“Any policy that continues to categorically single out the LGBTQ+ community is discriminatory and wrong”

Are straight people OK? And before you answer, just let me say: No. No, they are not.

Case in point: I just read an article about how there is a national blood supply shortage and then minutes later came across an article about Machine Gun Kelly (MGK) and Megan Fox drinking each other’s blood to celebrate their engagement. And apparently, Travis Barker and Kourtney Kardashian spent last year sharing sexual-innuendo-laden photos of blood vials on Instagram.

Am I saying that the blood shortage could somehow be alleviated if MGK and Fox donated instead of drinking that blood? No. I mean, as far as I can tell, MGK and Fox didn’t drink THAT much. But, hey, donating together maybe could have been a nice gesture.

But you know who can’t donate together? Pete and Chasten Buttigieg. And, no, not because they are too busy raising their baby twins (though “I’m too busy raising baby twins” is honestly a good excuse for just about anything, and BY THE WAY, we really need paid family leave in this country).

No, the Buttigiegs can’t donate blood because they’re gay. Wait? Is the ban on men who have sex with men (MSM) donating blood still a thing in the U.S.? Why, yes. Yes, it is.

And during a blood shortage, no less.

According to CBS News, this is the first time the Red Cross has declared the low level of blood on hand a national crisis. Their statement reads, “If the nation’s blood supply does not stabilize soon, life-saving blood may not be available for some patients when it is needed.” Yikes!

I don’t know about you, but I’m much more comforted by the idea of bleeding out and dying than I am in receiving life-sustaining blood that came from a GAY. Sadly, that twisted view is not hyperbole for some. And so, the ban on MSM blood remains.

According to ABC News, “The Food and Drug Administration bars people who have had sex with gay or bisexual men from donating blood for three months following the most recent sexual contact because of fears of HIV in the blood supply.”

Granted, the ban isn’t as strict as it used to be, and it went from a total ban to a year of required abstention. The COVID-19 pandemic ushered in the three-month version in 2020.

Anyone who isn’t a homophobic AIDS-panic weirdo understands that blood testing has come a long way since the ban was first enacted in 1983. For Pete’s sake, Pete Buttigieg was born in 1982! We’ve come a long way, baby.

This is why a group of 22 Democrats, including Senators Tammy Baldwin (D-WI), Elizabeth Warren (D-MA), Amy Klobuchar (D-MN), Cory Booker (D-NJ), and Tammy Duckworth (D-IL). Have written a letter to the FDA saying, “Stop being bloody stupid.”

“We write to express our alarm at the nationwide shortage of blood and blood products, which has placed patient care and safety at risk,” the letter, which is dated Jan. 13, begins. “We urge the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) to quickly act on the best available science and update its outdated and discriminatory blood donor deferral policies for men who have sex with men (MSM).”

But thankfully, it’s entirely within one’s own control whether or not they have a catastrophic event, whether it’s a car accident or a complication in the operating room, and most people will do the patriotic thing and say, “Not today, Bloodloss.” All so we can keep a policy that protects no one.

“Any policy that continues to categorically single out the LGBTQ+ community is discriminatory and wrong,” the letter continues. “Given advances in blood screening and safety technology, a time-based policy for gay and bisexual men is not scientifically sound, continues to effectively exclude an entire group of people, and does not meet the urgent demands of the moment.”

Unfortunately, we’ve seen how receptive people in the U.S. are to things that are scientifically sound, not to mention meeting urgent demands at the moment. So I’m sure this whole MSM blood ban will get fixed right quickly without anybody getting hurt.

But at least the Trump Administration isn’t at the helm? Maybe there is hope?

I don’t know. But in the meantime, I have some bespoke artisan blood vials to sell out of the back of my minivan. It’s for sale only to Internet celebrities who vow to use it only for completely self-obsessed purposes.

As God intended.